It’s just a friendly and these are just Christian Pulisic’s first two goals with Chelsea

America’s favorite EPL team is playing a meaningless friendly ahead of the Premier League season opening and is all over one of the Red Bulls (the one from Salzburg) thanks to a brace from Christian Pulisic.

His first goal would come after he darted in past the defense, gathered the ball, and slotted a shot through the defender’s legs (if you squint, you can see Jesse Marsch silently wishing he was back in New Jersey).

Then he was taken down in the box and set up a penalty for a player that hopes Frank Lampard has a use for him, Ross Barkley.

If there are questions about what Pulisic’s role under the NYCFC legend will be, it seems that the answer is - kick him the ball, let him run in behind the defense and see if he can score a goal.. because he’s done that three times and it’s only halftime.

Did I ever mention that the number 24 is my favorite number and that my support for Everton was both ironic and I only ever wanted the best for Ross Barkley when he left? Why did I just start singing - Come to the Shed and we’ll welcome you, Wear your blue and see us through? All we can go on is that this is a tune up game for The Blues, but if Pulisic can keep up this pace once real games start, he’ll score 76 goals this year and I’ll have to re-think that whole irony thing.